"Women's Signals Explained"
Are you confused by the signals that women are giving you; in other words, does it constantly seem like women are trying to tell you something, but when you hit on them they aren't really into it? (Hurts, doesn't it!). Do you wish you could tell what she's thinking just by analyzing her immediate behavior towards you? Or, are you wondering why women hardly ever give you any signals and you would like to get more? This document, "Women's Signals Explained," will clear up the mystery and make you much more effective at the ongoing non-verbal dialog with women.
First of all, I want to make it clear that I'm not a player and I don't condone it. This is about facilitating a man's interaction with women, not about exploiting them in any way. Also, by buying this document you are getting the benefit of my current research; in other words, this a very well developed work in progress, the underlying premise of which is of course quite sound, and it will definately help you if you are confused.
After my divorce, I was completely and totally confused when it came to dealing with women. I therefore proceeded to lose weight and start to experiment with my interactions with them and to analyze their behavior. After three and a half years, it finally makes sense! I've put a lot of time into this and I only want to help men who are very confused like I was, because we all know that women crave attention and will string us along to get it with out batting an eyelash.
It is my opinion that the body language books I've read don't go nearly far enough. For example, the idea of "clusters" (multiple varied and repeated signals) is not necessary (and rarely happens), plus no book I have read has gotten to the deep-down existing logical hierarchy of signals and the psychological basis behind them - that's right, women's behavior in this regard IS logical and therefore predictable to an extent, it just doesn't seem to be because it's very complex.
"Women's Signals Explained"
With women it is basically three independent variables in their thinking towards you. They are: emotion, 'sees a future with you', and availability. A woman can have any possible combination and degree of these variables together concerning you. Ironically, emotion is the one that is fairly irrelevant. She can have tons of emotion for you but without the other two you will probably get nowhere, unless you want to chase her for the rest of your life! (I suppose this CAN work, however, but...).
Essentially, I have discovered that if you are obviously not a player to her, every thing she does to get your attention falls on a spectrum ranging from unconscious signals and no interest on her part to a powerful attraction towards you with an equally powerful conscious attempt to stifle it because she is not available, to the same powerful attraction or 'Bioforce' I will call it with no attempt to stifle it because she is completely available. This stifling mechanism I'm referring to I will call the 'Conscious Governor' from now on. Now, this working paradigm ties in with the three above-mentioned variables: the bioforce consists of the emotion and 'sees a future with you' variables and the conscious governor is linked to her availability. The bioforce Vs conscious governor working paradigm can therefore be used to explain various types of behavior in women because every single action she makes has a definite psychology or mental state behind it relative to this paradigm that theoretically can be read. We will study these signals in detail. This behavior largely stems from biology, as the women's biological imperative is to reproduce with the most eligible male possible, and this urge is a force that wells up within her when she sees someone desirable. By the way, I have found that this is a largely non-verbal game and has nothing to do with how shy she is verbally; I have gotten big signals from very shy girls. Remember, if she tries to get your attention in any way, she finds you attractive on some level but it has nothing to do with how available she is!
Basically, there is an essential technique that MUST be used in order to get quality signals from a women that can be read. This technique involves walking into a room and being barely aware of all the females in the room but NEVER LOOKING AT THEM DIRECTLY. What women fear most is the predator man, and if you even just notice her first it sets of her warning signals. The above technique basically amounts to tracking them with your peripheral vision so you are not too surprised when she gives you signals and can act decisively, but keeping it so that she is not aware that you have noticed her. This technique tends to get them over their fear of you as a stranger and forces them to escalate their signals to get your attention if they are attracted to you; remember, it is a bioforce within them that they must always try to control if they are not available. Also, when you are doing this technique they notice that you aren't looking at ANY women and this is a quality they greatly desire in a man. Or, as an alternative, you can go what I call the 'all the way out' technique. This is quite simply not being aware of the females in the room AT ALL. You'll find that it is harder to act decisively when you do this because often you only have a very short window in which to act to get her number. I have found that you have about three seconds to act and if you don't, she often feels rejected and will not repeat any signals towards you. These techniques may be difficult for you to do at first but KEEP TRYING; they are absolutely essential to this approach towards understanding women. You will find after a while that it is very natural. The STRONG man does not think about, nor look at, women!
Ambiguity (mixed signals) exists with women of course; we will unfortunately never get this down to an exact science but we can improve it a great deal. Basically, ambiguity comes from her not being able to make up her mind if she is available or not (if you have followed the above-mentioned techniques). For example, you get good signals and the number but you call and she's not into it; it is likely that she thought she was available when she met you but Johnny called and she's not so sure now...
Unfortunately, it is a cold hard fact that you will never get anywhere with a woman unless she really wants to and that's what this is about, knowing accurately how much she wants to before you get involved with her...
THE SIGNALS BELOW ARE ORGANIZED FROM LEAST TO BEST:
If you are getting signals other than these, try to grasp the underlying psychological hierarchy that the signals below outline, then you can do a somewhat better job of estimating the signals that she is giving you. Just ask yourself, how much is she consciously trying to stifle her attraction to you or not, and how great is that attraction?
All guys probably know the big ones at the end of this list, but it's all the lesser signals that women give that cause all the confusion and misinterpretation.
Again, this is a work in progress the details of which are open for debate (but not the underlying premise as far as I'm concerned) and the author assumes no liability for it's use.
IF YOU ARE DOING THE 'PERIFERAL VISION' TECHNIQUE OR THE 'ALL THE WAY OUT' TECHNIQUE IN A ROOM:
AND SHE:
gets in your line of sight so that you look
PLUS:
she is looking in your direction with a 'robot stare.' (you can look right into her eyes and she will let you indefinitely, but she is 'checked out.') This means that she is too young or unable to handle you. This is completely unconscious behavior on her part.
or
she flips her hair. With this one, emotion is indeterminate, 'sees a future' is indeterminate (she can be attracted to you and not see a future with you), availability is low. Again, this is unconscious behavior - She is completely controlling her attraction to you and she is not aware that she is doing anything at all that could possibly send you a signal.
or
she arches her back. Same as the above. These are all primitive biological impulses so far that she is not consciously aware of and they are observed in all primates!
or
she gives you a 'soft' look (an 'I wish' look). This just means she wishes she could go out with you but she can't. There is definitely some emotion here though. Actually, emotion is medium, 'sees a future' is high, availability is low. I've hit on this and was only able to get her email. Maybe if you stick with it you could land her some day.
OR SHE:
"pulls" your eyes (stares at you until your instincts force you to look)
PLUS:
she just looks away to the side. Emotion is low, 'sees a future' low, availability low. It is annoying because she made you look in the first place...
or
she just holds your eyes for a brief moment then looks to the side. Emotion medium, 'sees a future' medium, availability low.
or
she gives you a 'surprised look.' Emotion medium/high, 'sees a future' high, availability low. She's surprised your getting to her when she's so in love with her boyfriend and surprised she's staring at you.
or
she looks down reflexively. I must be honest and say that I have yet to hit on this signal, she's attracted to you but it seems to me to be a "stifling" act; so I'd guess that emotion is medium/high, 'sees a future' high, availability medium/low. Let me know if you have any experience with this one...
or
she looks away but her eyes are bright. You'll get the number if you work at it but it's going to be a lot of phone work with no guarantee of a date. Emotion medium/high, 'sees a future' high, availability medium/low.
or
she looks AT you with her eyes bright. Emotion medium/high, 'sees a future' high, availability medium.
or
she looks hard into your eyes and holds it until YOU look down. She has a boyfriend but he's screwing up bad lately. Emotion high, 'sees a future' high, availability medium.
or
she looks down in a sexy flirtatious way. This is a great signal! Go get that number. Emotion high, 'sees a future' high, availability high.
or
she looks down than smiles. This is another great signal! Emotion high, 'sees a future' high, availability high.
or
she smiles into your eyes THE FIRST TIME you look at her. This is another great signal. Be careful with this one however; I don't trust a smile into the eyes after I've talked to her at all or gotten smaller signals from her earlier. emotion high, 'sees a future' high, availability high.
OR:
she gets in your personal space but doesn't touch you or look at you. Emotion high (she wants to be close to you), 'sees a future' indeterminate, availability low. This is almost unconscious; she is not aware that this could be interpreted as a signal.
or
you notice that she has been glancing at you, then she is hanging her head when you focus your attention on her. Again I must be honest that I haven't hit on this one yet, although it seems to me that she is trying hard to control herself because she is with someone, or for some other reason...Also it strikes me as too submissive (no fun). Let me know if you have experience with this.
or
rubs against you with some part of her body, WITHOUT eye contact. She's very attracted to you but isn't trying to send you a signal; you probably won't get the number. Emotion is medium/high, 'sees a future' high, availability medium/low
or
rubs against you with some part of her body WITH eye contact. Yup, this one is great. Got the numbers plus a "call me anytime" usually. They will do some amazing things in order to give you this signal. Like go get a napkin when she doesn't need one, for example. (It's always a good idea to position yourself in a room so that she could do this easily). Emotion high, 'sees a future' high, availability high.
IF YOU ARE IN CONVERSATION:
AND SHE:
is excited to talk to you but DOESN"T TOUCH YOU. This one is the worst. I once spent two hours talking to a girl at a party who was so into talking to me it was fantastic; I started liking her and thinking something was there, of course. Did I get the number when I asked? NO! Or,she can even say things like "give me your number we'll get together sometime." etc; don't trust it if she never touched you. She's thinking get together as friends. Women do this to men all the time and it's probably the biggest reason why men think that their behavior is incomprehensible! Emotion high (she likes you but...), 'sees a future' indeterminate, availability low, or could be emotion high, 'sees a future low, and availability high; she doesn't think she is giving you a signal! Yes, this is annoying.
or
she initiates a 'business transaction' type conversation with you where you end up exchanging numbers but she doesn't touch you. Emotion medium, 'sees a future' indeterminate (you may not be her type), availability low.
or
she touches you while talking. (NEVER touch her first. If you do this signal will be invalid.) If you don't touch her first, this signal rocks. Emotion high, 'sees a future' high, availability high.
or
she has a 'doggie dinner bowl' look. She wants to jump in the sack with you!
IF YOU ARE WALKING AND IGNORING AS THEY WALK BY YOU (GENERALLY NOT THAT GOOD OF A GAME BECAUSE IT HAPPENS TO FAST FOR THEM TO "HEAT UP," BUT BETTER THAN NOT IGNORING THEM)
AND SHE:
gets in your path forcing you to change direction and look at her
PLUS
any of the previous signals discussed above and their corresponding meanings
OR:
out of the corner of your eye you see that she is exhibiting 'non-directional smiling' (you'll know what I'm talking about as soon as you see this if you haven't already). You're getting to her but she's not available.
No discussion of women's signals would be complete without mentioning what I will call 'safe' signals - For example, she knows you probably wont hit on her when she is with her boyfriend so she feels that there is no need to consciously stifle her urges towards you, so she gives you big signals when she is with her boyfriend. This is annoying, to say the least. I think we can therefore conclude because of this behavior (it occurs often) that the conscious governor mechanism is usually only motivated by the fear of an awkward situation with you if she is unavailable rather than a sense of ethics! However, if she is with a group of her friends, I think she may just not realize that it is an awkward place for you to hit on her but I'm not sure...If you've got the courage to try this, let me know what happens!
Also, supposedly, I've heard that some women don't GIVE signals (always clamping down on their bioforce). This is possible, I guess, but I think it is pretty infrequent, although I could be wrong so keep it in mind.
Another option I suppose is that the woman is controlling her signals towards you not because of unavailability but because she has been hurt a lot in the past.
Of course, you could always have a women who is CONSCIOUSLY trying to mess with you, I think this behavior is pretty rare however. Usually they just aren't aware of the ramifications of their actions and their effect on you...
The three above scenarios are the exceptions to the norm but it is necessary to keep them in mind...
This study is a work in progress and by no means 'comprehensive.